[This is how I use these words (and how I’ve seen them used in the general kink and sex educator community). Joan would write these down in her ubiquitous notebook because you know she would. This list will grow as time goes on. If you have a question about something–leave a comment or contact me on Twitter or AO3 and I’ll add it here.]
Bottom: A person who has things done to them. The recipient or passive person in a scene. Does not have to be an s-type. If a D-type was a masochist and enjoyed being flogged–they could instruct their s-type to flog them. The sub would do so, which would be topping their Dominant, but their would still remain submissive to their Dominant in that they would be following instructions. Opposite of ‘Top’.
D-type: Dominant type. Dominant, Master, Mistress, Owner, etc. Also: ‘Capital letter type’ or ‘Leader’. Opposite of ‘s-type’. (I use D-type and Dominant interchangably unless speaking about a specific person and I know their title is Master/Mistress/Sir/etc.)
Play: Playing is a term for doing kink. BDSM is about exploring all sorts of parts of your psyche–light, dark, and everywhere in between–making up characters or learning about parts of your persona you don’t usually let out into the world. It’s about testing your boundaries and finding places you enjoy and relishing those. It’s how grown ups play.
s-type: submissive type. Can mean submissive, slave, pet, property, etc. Also known as ‘lower case type’ or ‘follower’. Opposite of ‘D-type’. (I use s-type and sub interchangably unless speaking about a specific person and I know their title is slave/pup/something-other-than-sub.)
Scene: 1. a scene is any kink interaction between two (or more) people that involves physical or psychological play. Scenes can be five minutes or an entire weekend. This can also be called ‘sceneing’. ‘I apologise for not calling you back–Master and I were sceneing and I forgot phones existed.’
2. the scene is the kink lifestyle. People can be in the scene and not have participated in kink scenes before, if they’re new. Likewise, some people aren’t active in the community, but do individual kink scenes all the time.
Top: The person who does things to another person in a scene. The active person in a scene. Does not have to be a D-type. [See ‘Bottom’ for more information on this.]