Sub Journal Prompt 004: SM and Pain

004. If SM is part of your dynamic explain how pain works for you. Is it a sexual turn on, a healing release, a spiritual moment, a session of giving?

I’ve not experience the ‘good’ kind of pain so this is entirely conjecture, but I think it would depend on the circumstance. I’m not a spiritual person so it’d never be a spiritual experience for me. I think that usually I would want pain as a way to bring me out of my head. Pain is immediate and would help me forget whatever was worrying me at the time. Then the neurochemicals would kick in and the experience, whilst still painful, would become the good kind of pain. And there would be the positive after effects of a good scene, as well.

In some circumstances pain could be sexual—spanking to me is more likely to be sexual than other types of pain, whereas flogging, whipping, coin stripping, evil wands, those are all pain for release.

I’m not sure what ‘a session of giving’ means. I’m reading it as pure submission, which seems to be what’s happening during the other two scenes. Perhaps if I wasn’t feeling stressed or sexual but was feeling submissive and wanted to show that by enduring some level of pain that would count. That’s not something I had considered before and I don’t really know my capacity for endurance. But now that I think on it, I like the idea of offering that up for someone. What more demonstrates submission and trust than allowing someone to physically hurt you? I’m fairly certain I’m not a painslut, so I don’t know how frequently I’d want to engage in that sort of pain play, but it’s an interesting motivation.

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